The Adebiyi Chronicles:Laparascopy

As I dey lydon for bed, na so I dey tink……….

Life hasn’t been this harsh to me in a long, long time. I probably had my worst result in my education history, my dad keeps on telling me how unserious I am (you guys should’ve been there when we told him my result, the reaction was epic), and my social life was like playing on the expert level of hangman to say the least (if u win that, go to hell!!!). Everybody then went back to school early January, so there was no reason to stay at home. So we were already planning to get back to school before the resumption date. However, it was that time that the strike decided to start and my laptop just got spoilt on the Friday before the strike started. The hustle was bad! But among all the events that occurred in 2011, nothing weighed me down more than the result of a simple hospital test that my mother took.

#nw sitting on my bed, put a pillow at my back & stretched my leg out with a troubled & thoughtful face while talking to one of my best friends who just stepped in. He wanted to hear me out……….

She had been complaining of different types of stomach pains whenever she had finished eating. It was funny because the pains were irregular; she didn’t complain all the time. I initially thought that it was a problem that deworming would solve (-_-….as in!), but she started feeling weak and tired, and worms in your stomach don’t do that (not that I know of). It was surprising because she hadn’t done anything strenuous. However, when she woke up she was fine and the night was normal, cooking dad’s food and shouting at me and my sister to come and clean up the kitchen. However, time went by and she started complaining more, with no irregularities. The moment my dad heard her complain he literally sent her to the hospital. When she complained to the doctor (after years of waiting), they said they were gonna test her and look at her organs since there were no problems physically (and there were no worms! WTF was I thinking?). They found out something I didn’t want to hear: appendicitis!

I don standa cuz I wan serve my guy drink wey I get for fridge. My guy open fridge see Hennessey, come dey whine me say make we pop am. Ehn chaply go coffee shop buy sprite so we go mix with the henny. We con settle down……….

The doctor said it was in its early stages, and the stones were still kinda weak. However, they needed to be removed, whether it was strong or weak, I didn’t care. The doctor looked at me and said: “There is no other way but surgery”.

If fireworks were blasting before when I heard the news, it probably caught something on fire by mistake when I heard that word. Surgery! Nah, I heard something else. Despite that fact that I knew that’s what she was gonna say, it was still kinda demoralizing to hear. My mom is gonna go under the knife. We had no choice but to find where we are gonna do it.

The first thing my sister said was “The UK” or “Yankee”! (-_-) I concluded she was mad when she said Austria. As expected, my mom was just thinking “Where will I do this surgery?” disregarding my sister in the process obviously. Then my mom called her sister, who was a doctor. The talked on the phone for days, looking for places where she could do the surgery, while me and my sister was thinking how we were gonna do a night vigil the day she was gonna do the surgery (#nw wondering when last I prayed…..smh).

We eventually found a place in Lekki phase 1. The place was owned by a pro surgeon. The place looked modest to say the least, not that I was expecting anything but the fear I had made me think of things that I normally wouldn’t think of. Anyway, we dropped her off at the hospital with her sister and our family friend (another doctor! Where my mama find these pple sef?). We talked for some time until we figured it was time to say goodbye for 2 or 3 days. She was gonna do the surgery in the morning around 8. I probably wondered what I was gonna be doing at that time………..

 My mom just called. We talked for a few minutes, rejoicing about my dad fixing the cars. She couldn’t wait to go out on Saturday for a friends party she was attending (original owambe!!!).

I love my mom!

We don tire to de sidon, we con notice say na 5 o’clock, so we go kit up go play ball……….

L8a peeps!


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